quote Ezza Melina
How people would wish they had a chance for a reset button in life, this is a story of that button.
I lived my life running either from the police or the dealers i owed money. I started this awful habit when i dropped out of school and started hanging out with my older brothers friends. I had wanted to experience on certain recreational drugs such as marijuana, happy-5, ecstasy, cocaine and heroin.
I was invited to this gig and was ask to play the guitar as rhythm. How could i refuse this chance to become famous. Before the show started, i was invited a special jamming session. The band had offered me cocaine mixed with crushed happy-5. They said that this will fuck you up and will destroy all your depression. The fact that it was drugs made me interest enough, so why not try something that would make you happy too right? I snorted a line of that mixture and the feeling kicked in instantly. I was ready to put on a show but the singer was to worried i might steal the show, so then i was offered a cigarette rolled in newspaper. I thought to myself "Maybe the ink would give a special effect, so why the hell not". I was mellow and hyper at the same time through out the whole show and the after party was a killer. More drugs.
I was offered to become the bands official rhythm line and i quickly accepted. I wrote a couple of songs for the band and made them relate my life with full of regret. They refused all of them so i turned the book into a journal. But i had more important things to do like for example: Every Thursday, Friday and Saturday, i would perform in the La' Conrad club. Never missed a special jamming session. The person who supplied the drugs was the club owner who i got closer to for special prices. when he knew of my intentions, he introduce me to the main land distributor. I would have direct access to all sorts of drugs. He had everything except for heroin because he had a general morals especially for those heroin abuser who could never kick that habit. I was happy enough that i could get my drugs for a cheaper price.
At any given time, i would have 4 different drugs on me. I was addicted to it, i missed a few practise session which led me to kicked by the bands, Stonehearts. I couldn't careless due to the fact that i had enough money to supply myself with drugs for almost 3 months. When your high day and night, you realize that the days fly by really fast. Before i knew it, i was borrowing money from my friends, parents and even former band mates. Even that wasn't enough, so i became a local snitch to the police to cut a deal with a corrupted cop. He would give me a pound of any drug for any dealer i had ratted out. I was loving the deal until the point that i deprived the whole state of their dealers. So i turn to him to fix me up, he said that he could fix his problems. I gave me a needle and i knew what to do. Before shooting up, i looked in the mirror and my morals kicked in. My small frame, red eye lids and bloodshot eyes, made me realize that things couldn't get any worse. So i quickly strapped my bicep with a belt and just injected myself with heroin.
This drug made me daring enough to commit any act of crime, stupid or just playing reckless. The one that i remember was the last stunt i pulled, i walked into the police station with my hands cuffed and escorted by a friend who got the uniform from a halloween costume shop. I walked in with the intention of walking into the evidence room and stuff all the drugs i can in my pocket and anus. It was desperate but i could at least get more money selling it to other people and become a distributor to the state. After months of shooting up and faking an arrest, i was caught in the evidence room. The policeman realized i was beyond stoned. So he fired his tazer gun at me but it was enough for him to knock me out. I quickly got up and reached for a knife that i saw in the evidence room. He rushed to me hitting me in the head with his metal baton. I was knocked out.
I woke up after a 3 week comma. I realized that i couldn't feel anything, remember anything and was wondering what was i doing in a hospital with flowers all over. I was told that i suffered from a comma and that i lost most of my memory. When i asked what had happened, no one told me anything. I remember a group of people with tattoo's, piercing's and crazy hair-styles visiting me. They didn't say much but had given me a bottle of liquor and said that it was the best bottle you can own. I wondered why but i heard them whispering something bout alcohol and crushed drugs. I didn't hesitate to drink this green looking water. I was knocked out completely, waking the next day with security outside my door.
The doctors helped me through rehabilitation and told me my whole life story. He said that i was a law abiding citizen who had no affiliations with any gangster or drug dealers. He said "A saint you are and shall always be". When i was welcome back home, i was smothered by my mother whose tears was overwhelming me with fear that i was gone for a long time. I remembered that i was in a comma and that was the only explanation. I saw my room and i had a flash back, it was weird cause i saw very profound vivid images. That night, i slept on the couch cause i was too afraid of this flash backs that was disturbing and tasteless.
One day, i was cleaning my room and getting rid of all my stuff until i found this black leather book which had lyrics apparently. And then a summary at the bottom, my first thought was that i was song writer before i had amnesia but then, the songs were to straight for a song. So my second guess was a story teller, but it had dates at the side until it stopped at 24 feb. So my last and final guess was that i was who ever i was reading about. I spent hours just reading that book entitled, 'Revival'.
No one had learnt of this particular encounter and no one shall ever know about it. I was happy with my life and was happy that i rid was given the reset button most people had hoped for. It was my chance and i took it whether i liked or not.
I drew love in the sky,
You were the wind,
You kept in moving,
But shattering at the same time.
quote Lucky13
Brilliance comes rarely,
Taste perfection slowly,
Deny envy whatsoever,
Love me unconditionally.
quote Lucky13
Sincerely,
Amnesia
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